Dear Jen,
I am 21 and have been with my soon-to-be husband for 8 years.  His sister and I got drunk a couple of weeks ago, and she told me that she'd like to experience sex with a woman.  I think she was trying to figure out if I was game, which I am, because I've always been attracted to women.  Plus she is unbelievably hot!  My problem is that a week later she told me, "I was so drunk that night that I don't remember what I said to you!" First of all, should I feel bad for wanting my boyfriend's sister?  And second, how can I get her back to those feelings without scaring her off?
- Hot For Sister

Dear Hot,
My goodness Mary, where do I even start with this one?  With your doomed marriage?  Your questionable taste in women?  Your improper placement of the phrase "my problem is"?

Unless you're a fundamentalist Mormon, or from some other culture where little girl children are forced to marry their uncles and such, why would anyone choose to be with the same person from the age of 13 until death do you part?  It just sounds so fun free.  Especially when, eight years and a couple tequila shots into it, you're in the market for a little in-law cest?   

Please, do not marry your boyfriend.  At least not right now.  You need to get a few more experiences under your belt, and ladies in your pants, before you settle down.  Signing up for a committed relationship at this point in your life would be unfair to both him and you.

Please, do not sleep with his sister.  There are countless other unbelievably hot ladies who would love to get all naked and wiggly with you.  Even when they're sober.  Plucking mates off the same family tree is just asking for a shit storm of drama.  Plus it's mean.  If you're subconsciously doing it to sabotage your commitment to your boyfriend, there are far more graceful ways to bow out. 

Please do sleep with a girl, a boy, a toy, a football team - whatever your fabulously filthy  little mind finds appealing.  You appear to possess a rare and beautiful openness to new experiences that would be a shame to waste, and that could lead to resentment down the road if unexplored.  Let yourself live a little.  Then, if you and your boyfriend decide to pick up where you left off, you'll be doing so as a much more well-rounded, self-actualized, and question mark-free person.

Dear Jen,
Is there any way to tell if a woman is faking an orgasm?
- Suspicious

Dear Suspicious,
You know, there probably is, but it no doubt requires complicated neurological monitoring devices, goggles, and a divining rod.  For even I, The Worst Actress In The World, have managed to pull it off undetected in the rare, uninspired moment.  I've also been on the other end, heard women say things like,  "member that time I chewed a hole through your pillow, asshole?  I was faking it!"  I really had no idea.

You could feel for contractions down there, monitor her heart rate and breathing, and dissect the sincerity of her screaming "Sweet Jesus YES!," but who wants to be at the science lab when you could be at the party?  

Besides, I think the real question here is not is she faking it, but why is she faking it?  If you know why, you're not only closer to finding out if, but, more importantly, to discovering how to improve your sex life so she doesn't ever have to again.

Here are some common reasons that a zero might masquerade as an O:

1.)            She wants to get it the hell over with because she’s tired, bored, not feeling it, etc.
2.)            You suck in bed and she wants to make you feel studly.
3.)            She sucks in bed and wants to appear more studly.
4.)            She's doesn't know how to have an orgasm and she feels ashamed.
5.)            She's on anti-depressants or some other drug that makes it hard for her to get there.
6.)             She was at the point of orgasm, but then lost it, and it got so far away that it seemed like it would take hours to get it back, so she just opted to fake it and maybe try again later.

In the end, it always comes down to good old communication.  The female bell ringer can be pretty squirrely and require a lot of concentration, so the more you know about what she needs, the better.